October 2022 Monthly Letter
Our September letter was on kindness and this month I asked Pastor High if he would write a letter on forgiveness. We are happy to share his thoughts with you.
The Healing Power of Forgiveness by Willard High, Pastor Emeritus
Forgiveness can be a psychological, spiritual, and a physical activity. We all know the feeling. Someone wrongs us and we begin to consider the injustice or disrespect of the individual, group or nation. Hurt feelings, anger and a desire for an apology usually follow. We may enjoy our anger and desire some form of retribution in proportion to or greater than the hurt or harm they inflicted upon us – repayment!
That reminds me of what happened recently between opposing Little League baseball teams Texas East and Oklahoma. You can view it on YouTube under, “Little Leaguer Consoles Pitcher after Getting Hit in the Head.” Kaiden Sheldon, the pitcher for Texas East, threw what appeared to be a fastball to Isaiah Jarvis, the hitter from Oklahoma. The ball hit both Isaiah’s helmet and the left side of his head and he fell to the ground instantly. After what seemed like an eternity the shaky hitter made his way to first base. Seeing that the pitcher was crying and so shaken he could not go on, Isaiah walked to the pitcher’s mound and embraced and comforted him. It was a powerful moment!
Let’s go deeper. It is not easy to forgive. Some offenses are so egregious that they call for more time and stricter measures. In the situation described above the hurt player offered forgiveness before the offender apologized because he observed a clear non-verbal apology. But what if the offender does not speak or demonstrate remorse? Alexander Pope said, “To err is human to forgive divine.” Only God who said, “Forgive them for they know not what they are doing” can give us the power to forgive in such a situation and unless we ask for help we will be left to struggle with psychological, spiritual and sometimes physical pain on our own.
How wonderful would it be to wake up the next day without anxiety and bitterness destroying peace of mind and coloring life’s decisions? Understand that offensive and hurtful people do not always feel your pain. My intent is not to minimize abuse, encourage anyone to endure repeated abuse or to support abusive behavior. Sometimes the best remedy is getting help and providing space so abuse cannot continue uninterrupted. What they have done to you may just be the way they live. However, if we choose, even in complex situations we can seek forgiveness for the offender whether he or she apologizes, even if the person is no longer alive. We forgive others more for our sake than theirs. Christians are taught to the best of their ability to live at peace with others, which pleases God. What if the person who hurt you is dead? You have two choices: continue your war with the dead until you also die or forgive and live out the rest of your days free of the weight of anger, hurt and bitterness. How? If you are willing, ask God who is divine and is well practiced in forgiveness to give you this ability. I have tried it and it works. Choose to Forgive – it makes life happier, more peaceful and immeasurable better.
